Dating 101: Germany vs. U.S

*PSA – this blog will not contain as many pictures as my previous blog post. Taking pictures with guys on first dates is quite awkward.. especially if they don’t make it to the second date. LOL

“I go on too many dates, but I can’t make them stay.” – Taylor Swift

 

My friends like to call me a serial dater and if you continue reading this blog, you’ll find out why!

Dating is one of my favorite past times, yes, it happens that often. This comes back to my interest in meeting new people. I like spending my time hearing people’s stories, finding a common interest, and networking. If this individual just happens to be attractive as well, then that’s just icing on the cake. I’ve been single for the past five months since I’ve been in Berlin and I think this was a great way to start my life in a new country. Jumping into anything serious right off the back may have been detrimental to the extreme amounts of progress I’ve made.

P.S, I’ve accomplished so much in the past five months that I couldn’t be more proud of myself.

Okay, back to dating in Berlin. There are three major differences in dating between the U.S and Germany that I’ve noticed since living in Berlin. They include more laid back dates, more reserved men, and more diversity.

1. Laid back dates

When I was living in Minnesota, the dates I went on were less laid back. For example, the guy I was going out with would ask what my favorite restaurant was or what my favorite activity was, and we would do that. They would also come pick me up, pay for the date, and initiate the first move for a good night kiss, things that I thought were completely normal. In my experience, dates in Berlin have been quite opposite. Berlin is a laid back city, but I didn’t expect that to influence the dating scene. On a typical German date, we pick a meeting place, which makes me so uncomfortable. Like I mentioned earlier, my previous suitors would pick me up at home and we would show up together. I understand Berlin is a large city and most people don’t drive, but I get so awkward meeting someone in public instead of them picking me up. “Don’t be weird, don’t be weird, don’t be weird.” “Oh god, I really hope I don’t have to fart.” “Don’t trip like you always do Tina.” “I hope my make-up and hair are still on fleek.” I think about all of these things even more now because I’m so awkward that I have to meet my date in public.

2. Reserved men

Ladies, is it just me, or do we all prefer more outgoing, confident men? Personally, shy guys turn me all the way off. I like to date men that know what they want and aren’t afraid to make it known. Confidence is very attractive, but German men seem to be lacking in that category. Simply holding my hand as we’re walking down the street, kissing me out of the blue, or giving me compliments can make a world of a difference. What I can’t seem to comprehend is how German men can be so direct, but extremely reserved at the same time. I believe that individuals with direct communication skills typically aren’t reserved, but I seem to be wrong.

3. Diversity

Within the past five months, I’ve dated men from more countries than I knew existed. Okay, I’m joking, my geography skills aren’t that bad. This fact isn’t meant to highlight the number of dates I’ve gone on, but more so the different types of people I’ve gone on dates with. Like I’ve mentioned before, I love learning about new cultures. So, having gone on dates with men from Pakistan, Israel, Ghana, Turkey, Slovenia (my personal favorite), Germany, France, Poland, Austria, Greece, Spain, Italy, and Sweden allows me to increase my global knowledge, (which is really all I want in life haha.) I’m blessed to be living in a city that has such a high level of diversity because I wouldn’t have these experiences in Minnesota. The biggest thing I’ve taken away from dating men from all over the world is that we’re all humans. Not that I didn’t know this before, but race, religion, sexual orientation, and political beliefs, have separated mankind to the extent that individuals think people from different countries will be drastically different. Don’t get me wrong, there are differences in culture, language, and complexion, but that doesn’t mean we’re different people. We have the same organs, similar biological make-up, and tendencies as humans, so we’re more alike than different. I want the world to stop trying to divide and come together as one. Overall, diversity in life and dating is amazing and I wouldn’t trade it for the non-diverse dating scene in Minnesota.

 

Have you ever gone on one of those amazing, perspective changing dates? Well, I did this past February. I know the specific date, but I don’t want you guys knowing about my psycho side just yet. 😉 I remember waiting for him at KFC and seeing all these people walk by, but not knowing which one was him. (I’m very near sided and didn’t have my contacts in at the time.) Then I saw someone who I assumed was a model because he was so attractive, start walking towards me. I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest. Thankfully, it ended up being him. The date was very casual and we just met for drinks at a hotel bar, but it was one of the best dates I’ve ever been on. There’s not much more to this story, but I did keep a memento from the date so I’d always remember that day.

 

On the flip side, I’m sure most of us ladies have dealt with *uckboys. Sometimes I feel like I have a sign on my forehead that reads “*uckboys wanted.” I don’t understand the desire to waste someone’s time. Honestly, there was a point in my life where I would entertain this behavior because I didn’t want to be alone, but man has that changed. I support #bumlife to the highest degree because it is my life. I’m a homebody and enjoy my own company more than anyone else’s, so there’s simply no room for *uckboys.

Recently, a public figure in Germany slid through the DM’S on Instagram. (If you don’t know what that means, consult a black person or urban dictionary.) The wild part about this is that the man’s on a TV show for dating. I’m going to see you on TV pursuing a very pretty lady, so why advertise the single life in my DM’s? The whole situation was quite humorous to me, but can definitely be a downside to the single life.

I’m not going to lie, guys, I’m crushing pretty hard, but his name will remain a secret. 😉 If anything comes from this, I’ll make sure to update you guys. *fingers crossed*

A couple selfies never hurt, right? 🙂

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